Self-involved, but with a great taste in music

Thursday, December 23, 2010

A few things I won't need to try to remember

This has been a very interesting year.

It's been unsettling. And at times rapturous. It's been time with close friends. It's been frantically dealing with bills and difficult decisions.

But one of the things that I'll take away from this year is the growth I've seen from so many people around me. People of different ages, different walks of life... so many people have seemed to "get it" this year.

Whether is be walking away from a bad situation.
Or getting yourself into a good situation.
Or hanging in there when the worst fears are realized.
Or letting yourself try something new.
Or not being unnerved by massive change.

I won't get too existential right now, but my theory on the meaning of life has to do with differences and challenges. That something placed the ingredients that ultimately produced us, insects, micro-organisms, meteors in the same universe and we're all supposed to mix somehow. That coexistence would be realized and balance formed. And the relationships we have with one another are an example of this effort to relate with others that have a different view and outlook than our own.

I'll look back at 2010 as a year where many relationships were established and some very rewarding bonds were cultivated further.

But how about some of the more tangible, memorable things of 2010?

Top 5 Movies

... Okay, not a great year for movies. These two get an honorable mention...

Comedy: She's out of my league
Horror: Paranormal Activity 2

But these are the only two that deserve to be ranked:
2. (500) Days of Summer* (not 2010, I know. But was viewed then)
1. Inception (best movie I've seen in more than a decade)

5. The Hunger Games (I did like it!)
4. The Road - I'm surprised by it's acclaim. The tone and mood is consistent throughout. So are the characters. Usually books/movies without character development don't fare too well, but this bucks the trend a little. I'm glad to have read it but I don't know it's something that I'll revisit again.
3. Number 9 Dream
2. Dance, Dance, Dance
1. Heaven's Net is Wide - I don't know if I have a writing style when I actually write a story, but if I do it's most akin to Hearn. While I loathe my writing often times I can't get enough of Hearn. Heaven's Net is Wide is a prequel to the Tales of the Otori books. I'm only about 100 pages in but it's already wonderful and I'll finish it before next week. It's a hybrid between young adult, japanese historical fiction, fantasy, and with a little romance. This is my favorite series.

Cloud Atlas has a good shot to dominate this list, but we'll see if I get through that before the year ends. I need to find it first...!

And in the coming days I'll pull together the 2010 mix cd with tracks that I discovered or that were shown to me in 2010.

I'm looking forward to sitting by a fire with some hot cocoa with a touch of Baileys... ahh... I adore this time of year.

Thursday, December 2, 2010

Did you know...

That Better Homes and Gardens is the 3rd most distributed magazine in the United States?
(congrats Cole!


Did you know that I'm extremely bored at work today?

What in us helps us procrastinate? Laziness and fear come to mind.

I'll discuss two examples from today.

8am meeting. Why? Why do you exist? Who likes you? The organizer likely dislikes you the least, therefore is okay with setting such an obscene time. Because 8am doesn't mean get up at 8. And it doesn't mean go to sleep at the normal time, as I set my redundant upon redundant alarms. And it doesn't mean restful sleep until 7am, it's panicked waking and grabbing my phone to check the time.

So 6:55am - alarm one (okay, I set you as a primer to the 7am wake up. Let me enjoy the last 5 minutes of warmth)

stare at my phone with dead eyes until 6:58. (i'm sure i can milk this lying in bed thing to at least 7:05)

7:00am - alarm two and three (yep, I can DEFINITELY milk this to 7:05. Nod off and start dreaming about pouring milk on people's heads at the bus stop. I laugh. I start to feel cold and envision myself warming milk in the microwave and pouring some on people while keeping some in my cup to warm my hands)

7:14am - No alarm. (CRAP. I need a new alarm. I don't need an alarm that actually trusts me when I say "I'm up." I need the Lifetime-movie-of-the-week-husband alarm clock that swears I'm unfaithful. I would love an alarm that would give me the traffic and weather. That'd be nice. And if it played mp3s. I bet I know what I'd put on there... I'd start with some Bon Iv...

7:22am - .... (WTF!! I fell asleep again?!?!?!?!)
Get up and shower. Drew a hot shower today. Felt real good. I just stood there and visualized my path into work. What roads to avoid. Mentally shaving off key seconds on the commute. I thanked the Gods that I had put fuel into the car yesterday. But I do need to schedule an oil change. It'd be really nice if...

7:35am - (DAYDREAMING?!?! About tasks???) Running out the door and driving like a mad banshee down Glendale Ave (and we've hit cram time. the panic gets my blood going and I'm focused and alert. I know that any slacking or dragging on the drive will make me late. In the back of my mind an idea crystallizes... why do I do this to myself?)

And here I am. Example two. Busy at work. Chatting away in the blog. Delaying my work flurry until the end of the day. Why? I think it's because I need that fear and excitement to really apply myself. It'd be too exhausting to sprint all the time, so a little jaunt until the last 100 meters and then a mad/freakish dash to the finish.

I used to turn my clocks forward blindly so I wouldn't know how off they were. But of course the mind is a lazy jerk and it was only a matter of time before it deciphered that the alarm clock was ahead by X, the microwave clock was ahead by Y, and the car clock was off by Z.

So my never-ending path to maturity has revealed the next step, a mastery of the timing of my own effort. I'll let you know how it goes... ... sometime.