Self-involved, but with a great taste in music

Friday, May 21, 2010

Mrs. Robinson

Us single people, by single I mean not married, we all have a book. It's an interesting book because it has no spine, pages, or words -- yet it is something to be adhered to as if it were religious text.

The unwritten rules of dating

Many are fairly universal. If a girl brings up her dad at... inopportune times... that's an entry that (I'd like to think all of us can agree) we toss on the Con list.






(unless it's Alan Thicke, because he's one of the baddest mamba-jahambas on the planet)




Throughout the life of this blog we'll explore some of mine:

Unwritten Rule # ___ (not written, no numbers): Just Say No to Cougars

I took the liberty of using a picture for an instructional diagram, adding some additional red, purple, and pink notes to the following:











































Here's the thing about cougars... there's not a set baseline for determining the difference between a woman and a cougar, BUT we know there is certainly a difference. Not all of them are sitting with their cougar friend blowing chain-smoking smoke into each others overly fake tanned leather faces.

Therefore it can be hard to follow this unwritten rule because sometimes you just WANT to believe those hungry eyes when they say, "I'm in no rush."

Here are some actual quotes that are on the danger list...

During a preliminary conversation:

- "have you ever thought about what names you'd like to name your kids?" Run.

- "a lot of other girls my age are looking to settle down, but I'm not like that." Run.

- "my second husband..." Run HARD.

1 comments:

Cole said...

hahahahahahaha

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